breastfeeding

I am very pro-breastfeeding for all the obvious reasons. With Riley, I told myself I had to nurse for at least 6 months. Then a year rolled around and I couldn't imagine stopping. Another important part of breast-feeding is how it stops....and for me...self weaning is the only thing that seems right. So Riley self weaned down to 2 times a day, morning and night, at 14 months. And then by 18 months she was down to just one feeding at night before bed. She easily let this go when I offered her a bottle of warm water at bedtime. Yes, water. (I was very weird....still am I guess....but I think cows milk is so gross and couldn't imagine giving it to a baby). Nursing her for 18 months was great. She was ready to stop and I was emotionally ready for her to move on.

It is slightly different with Milo. As I mentioned, he bites. Riley never bit. He bit so hard once in january when he was cutting his second top tooth, that I had this horrible, painful puncture wound that felt like I was being stabbed every time he latched for 3 weeks. He flails and thrashes around, latching and unlatching and it is like holding a bag of kittens. Wild, feral kittens on crack. In a bag that weighs 20 lbs.

Another thing is this: I would like to have another baby. Not right this second....but yes, in the next 6 months or so, We would like to start trying again (I say "we"....but have not really told my husband yet). I want him to have a sibling close in age...no more than 2 1/2- 3 years apart....which means I need to start trying in August. As in THIS august. Weird, right?
I am one of those weird chicks that doesn't get her period, thus making it impossible to pregnant, as long as I am breastfeeding. Even after I was down to the 2 nursings a day with Riley....and then not at all past 18 months....i didn't get my period again until she was almost 2.

So....what to do. The best part is that Milo will not take a bottle, pacifier, sippy cup....

Ug.

Don't get me wrong, I still love it 90% of the time. I am not ready to give it up, and I really don't think that is even possible right now. I have no idea how I would even begin....it is still such a huge part of mothering right now. I nurse, on demand, many times a day. And when he is not a biting bag of feral kittens, I love it. It is so cozy and warm. It is the only time he really slows down and cuddles (he is very busy right now, like most 10 month olds) and I love that I have a food source, ready to whip out, anywhere, anytime. And if that grosses you out, well, you should probably look away.... :)