Kira

my best friend from college....one of my most favorite people in world...has a baby girl, Kira, who is one month younger than Milo...and last week Kira had croup...my friend didn't like the way her breathing sounded so took her to the ER...they admitted her and put her on oxygen for the night....but then next day she wasn't better...then they decided to put her on a ventilator because she was having a lot of trouble breathing....and then the doctor couldn't get the tube down her throat. so the did an emergency scope and discovered she has a web of cartilage blocking her airway and vocal chords. (this explains the cute, soft, raspy voice she has always had...and her wheezing that her pediatrician said was nothing to worry about).

So they gave her a tracheotomy. then the next day her lungs collapsed and her trach failed. so they put tubes in her lungs and re-did the trach. so Kira was totally sedated, with a feeding tube, a trach, and a ventilator. imagine seeing your baby like that. imagine not being able to hold your baby, nurse them, comfort them....

i can't put in words how this feels. no words really capture the feeling in your chest when your friend is watching her baby struggle for life. her whole life has crashed in front of her...

and you read stories of these type of things happening to people....but they never happen to you..your family...your best friend's 9 month old baby. until it does.

and i just want her better.

and i keep looking at Milo and crying. because he is healthy and i love him so much. every time i complain about his biting or his lack of sleeping....i am then flooded with the realization that he is healthy. and i should just squeeze him and cuddle him and enjoy all of this. take a deep breath when it gets stressful, and enjoy.

Kira is now stable. she is being lifeflighted to Seattle Childrens tomorrow (they live in Montana). She will have surgery later this week to remove the cartilage...

so, here i am, asking for everyone to send healing thoughts to Kira.

i took this pic in January when they visited...